Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Eventing bingo fun!

So as I mentioned a couple of posts ago, Emma is hosting Eventing Bingo.  Some of these ladies are on point and have come up with AMAZING stories.  TeresaA?  Hilarious.  Wendy?  AMAZING.  I am neither, just warning you haha!

Mia has been my special child, though not nearly as special as App.  Oh, the stories I have on that man.....  This year, though, we are going to kill it.  We have worked on dressage over the winter (well, I mean kinda, between being broken and it being bitter cold) and we have worked on stadium (well, not really that either, but we can pretend) so we are going to be awesome this year.  We go to our first HT of the season in May and we are prepared to KILL it.  In warm up Mia is responding very well, round, soft, things are looking up for this season, I tell ya.  We get in the ring and Mia goes from amazeballs to OMG LOOK!  I CAN'T HORSE RIGHT NOW!  Again.  This happened last fall, remember mare?  We talked about this, we weren't going to do this again.  She is suddenly very attentive towards a scraggly, wormy, skinny bay gelding who looks like he rolled in mud and was groomed only for a saddle pad.  Why is my mare being mareish all of a sudden??  It should be of no surprise that right as we go "near" this gelding (I hope to god he is gelded anyway, no one should be passing on that neck or hind end) Mia blatantly ignores my cue and leaps forward into a canter/gallop, on the wrong lead of course.

I pull her back, boot her in the ribs with my "encouragement nubs"and we at least pick up the correct lead.  Progress right?  For whatever reason, Mr. Ugly is walking behind the judge's booth as we finish and I have to literally pull Mia for her halt as she wants to go see him, so much for a good impression.  Mare, stop thinking with your ovaries!  We go back to the trailer and take the LONG way around to avoid Mr. Ugly and get ready for XC.  It's okay, we got this, XC is our strong point!  After a quick rest, we go to the start box... and you have got to be kidding me.  They are running out of order and Mr. Ugly is literally leaving now and there are only 2 of us to go next.  SMDH.  I am not even sure how Mr. Ugly makes it on course, he looks like a camel as he saunters along, at least he looks gelded, thank goodness for small miracles.  I have the other gal go next to put some space between Mia and Mr. Ugly and then go on course.  On the other side of the field, I can see Mr. Ugly about to finish the course.  Great!  I won't have to worry about him!  Uh oh, Mia saw him too.  Uh oh...Mia is accelerating.  Brakes are failing...  We fly over the first few fences before I am able to yank her back to a canter.  We go over a scary coop and I used leg to make sure we go over.  Oops, apparently that was the wrong solution we are now a runaway again.  Apparently, the gal in front of us has had issues at the water so I yell "HORSE INCOMING" as we FLY by her through the water at almost a gallop.  Uh, good to know Mia is okay with water still?

Mia doesn't care what I point her, we fly over everything.  At least I have steering, it just that pesky brake issue.  And then we came in one second under the speed fault time, way too fast mare.  Way too fast.  And no, we did not catch up with Mr. Ugly.  On the way back to the trailer, I swung by to check scoring, small miracles they have already scored dressage!  Wow already!  Oh geez....we got a 46%.  I mean, no real surprise but it IS a schooling show, that's a little rough for a schooling show where we DID actually do all of the movements.  Grrr.  But somehow we are still in the ribbons, 6th place!  At least the judge scored everyone equally poorly?

We retire to the trailer where we prep for stadium and I gave Mia a very stern talking to.  First, we do NOT lose our marbles over a man.  Secondly, we do NOT lose our marbles over a gelding who we will not see again.  She didn't seem interested in the mother/daughter talk and munched hay while looking for her lost love.  *Sigh*  We went to the stadium ring and went in right away.  Mia was on fire, in a good way finally.   When I sat up, she sat up and gave me the bouncy canter I wanted for stadium.  This is awesome!  As we came around jump 5....there he was.  Mr. Ugly hanging by the in-gate.  Mia started to accelerate so I gave her a very strong half halt.  I then very nearly came off as she slammed on the brakes and chipped in an extra stride instead of compressing her stride and jumping like a trained, experienced horse.  Like the horse I thought I had.  At least I stayed on?  Apparently, that half halt was too strong, consider that noted Mia, I heard your message.  The combo of 6/7 rode very nicely, as did 8 and 9.  10, however, was headed straight for where Mr. Ugly had just planted himself and Mia was having none of my opinions.  As we approached the last fence, she stumbled 2 strides out and I saw my life flash before my eyes.  I am going to die and it is all Mr. Ugly's fault because he made Mia lose her marbles!  Mia's nose hit the dirt before she popped up and LEAPT over the fence, easily clearing the jump and most likely the standards (if I dared to look at the official photographer's pictures).  OMG.  All I can say is thank goodness for my new saddle as it kept me in position and I didn't fall off and die in front of all of these people.  How embarrassing.  We finished the round double clear and walked out as Mr. Ugly took his turn.

I watched him go and while he looked like a camel when he moved, he did jump everything and was clear.  Go figure right?  They announced the placings right then and there and we moved up to 5th due to the gal before me on XC and the issues they had at the water.  Even with XC speed fault penalties we placed!  I can say, this is one show I am so glad to be over and I would not be upset if none of these people saw me again.  At least I got my satin, even if Mia didn't get her "man".

I had fun, I hope you had fun reading it.  Let's hope this DOESN'T actually happen, though I am sure a great story would come of it!  This was a fictional story, even if it started to sound VERY realistic in my head.

1 comment:

  1. bahaha those hearts on your bingo card are PERFECT!!! omg poor Mr Ugly!! and Mia, wth girlfriend? you know the whole "kiss the toad and he'll transform into a prince" thing is bogus right???? lol i love this - great story, thanks for playing!!! :D